Monday, March 30, 2009

Off to a wonderful start

Today was a special day. It still is, I am only half way through.
I got to start it out by going and getting the girls squished for their glamour shots. I have to hand it to Kaiser Permanente at this point. As much as they piss me off with other stuff, like refusing to do a colonoscopy (it costs too much! yea, right!), they make up for it somewhat by doing a quick and painless mammygram. I had this done at another place and I walked out almost in tears, being pushed, pulled, poked and prodded, Not to mention sqished to about a quarter of an inch. The Kaiser people are gentle and non painful. Plus, they are quick! They said plan for an hour, I was there under 25 minutes! Didn't even have time to read my waiting room book.
So the rest of the day will be working on water related appliances etc. The toilet innards broke yesterday before I left for work, so we have been camping out with that. You know...pouring a bucket of water in to flush. I turned the water off to it, because the tank wouldn't fill. Then I need to tighten up connections in the shower. We keep getting sprayed with cold water while in the shower cause something on the cold water side needs afixin'. Then I have to address the washing machine. It spews water out the bottom everytime we do laundry. That sounds looks like a crack in the tub or the bottom bearing is giving out. My new washer is going to a machine repair guy for parts after I find ANOTHER washer. I have the worst luck with these things!
Hope your day is great!
Oh! After I figure it out I will post some pictures my daughter took with my dad's old camera. She took some fantastic photos and cropped them so they were perfect. I am in awe of what she has accomplished!

Sunday, March 22, 2009

See what happens when a person gets bored and they are tired? I came home and looked online...blogger...I don't remember who's blog, but I found this and thought it was funny. Candy Love!

fail-owned-maoam-fail
more fail, owned and pwned pics and videos

Thursday, March 19, 2009

I am feeling better 'bout that shoe.

Thanks for your support.
Now, I am beginning to believe that YD was freaking out inside and just couldn't say things the way she wanted to say them. Then they all came out wrong. Plus, she knows horses, not medical terms and she is only 21 so therefore immortal.
We went to her Dr. appt today. I was a bad mommy and drilled her most of the way over the hill. (a 45 minute drive) Not really drilled, but I asked quite a few questions. Most of which needed, say a nurse to interpret, to get laymen type answers. YD doesn't know all of what the stuff was they were doing or the name of the actually medication they injected. She told me, "Mom, I am not worried, so you shouldn't be worried." I replied, "Well, sweetie, (in my most sickening sweet voice) sometimes you don't worry when you should. It's your age, it's okay. I'm the Mom and I am going to worry, cause I love you and I would hurt if you hurt, so let's agree that you will let me support you in any way I can." She agreed. (If only to shut me up with the questions)

The result of the past couple of weeks medical visits are good. It is just a tissue. The cervix being operated on a few years ago is doing double duty to heal it self...or "over heal". The tissue built up in her fallopian tubes and caused a fluid build up in her ovaries. The shots she received last week are doing their job. What ever they were looking for in her bloodtests came back better than they had hoped. They wanted some count down by 15% and it came down 25%, so the doc is happy, which makes me happy!
She needs to go back once a week for blood tests until the whatever they are watching for is at 0%. (or 8 weeks, whichever comes first)
Thank you for being here for me to sound off to. I was near to tears last night. Now I am mostly smiles....I am pooped!
Love you guys!

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

The Other Shoe Drops...

I have been going along my merry little way. Getting more positive day by day. Things have been going fairly well, and Spring is around the corner.
Yea...that's what she said.
My YD has been dropping little tid bits of information about her medical problems, choosing her words carefully so as not to upset my applecart. But I have Google. Damn you Google!
About two years ago, give or take four or five months, YD found out she had cervical cancer. Thanks HPV, yea, thanks a lot! But it was taken care of. The doc told her she had to have pap smears every six months.
She just had another one about a month ago, and mentioned that they were concerned about some swelling in her fallopian tube. So they sent her to someone else, who sent her to someone else and on and on. She finally is getting the help she needs.
I know I am slow. I know she can tell me things in a way that I don't fully grasp the full extent of what she is telling me. She. Does. Not. Want. To. Freak. Me. Out.
I am freaked out.
They gave her Chemo last week. I didn't get that that is what she was telling me, cause she just said shots to get the tissue to stop growing. But I have Google. And I found out. Well, after a couple of days of her talking about these shot and how she was feeling nauseated, and couldn't eat.
My daughter, my youngest is taking this all on, by herself. Because she doesn't want to freak me out!
Tomorrow we go to the doc for lab work and "maybe" more shots. I am having a talk with her about how I have found her out, and how I am more freaked out about her going through this alone. She can't do that to me.
Her cervical cancer has moved up and on. I don't know the full extent of the cancer. It scares the shit out of me.
What really scares me is a comment she made about dropping a girlfriend the other day. What she said was...in other words...if this cervical cancer is going to do me in and I only had six months left to live, I do not want to spend that six months with a "friend" who does nothing but complain about how bad her life is. (She told the "friend" that) She said, "Mom, it was just one of those thoughts that takes on it's own life, it wasn't coming from anywhere and it's not going anywhere."
What would you think?????

Sunday, March 15, 2009

My First!



Sue over at Stitching and Life in the Company of Pets gave me my first award. Like I told her I will wear it with pride! Sue has a wonderful blog where she shows us her beautiful stitching and stories of her pets and daughter who is an adventeress. Pop over and say hi!
I would like to pass this award on to five others who I feel have been great commenters!

Kim-D

Mary Ellen

Debbie

Lisa

Hallie

Do y'all know how hard it is to pick just five? I love you all and I think you are all great commenters. You have given me a good look at all sides of the coins out there in life. And you all make it fun to blog.

Thank you Sue!

Saturday, March 14, 2009

I got this in my email box yesterday

http://www.bornagainamerican.org
It moved me to tears. All I could see were the beautiful faces and hear the beautiful voices. I was mesmerized by the awesomeness of it.

Saturday, March 07, 2009

Me as Superhero

Thank Stacie...I just had to know...




You Would Be a Crafty Superhero



You are naturally curious and even a bit of a snoop. You like to have dirt on everyone - both enemies and friends.



You get bored easily and need excitement in your life. You like having problems to solve.



You understand people quite well and often know what others are thinking. Because of this, you can get people to do what you want.



You are a shapeshifter who fits in with almost any group. You can get along with anyone. You're quite flexible.



You are a true philosopher. You are thirsty for wisdom. You are trying to figure out the meaning of life.

Friday, March 06, 2009

Little Prince Dozey Boy



His name is really Dozer. I just like to shorten things up a bit. Ya know? Like a nickname.
I thought I lost him yesterday. I get teary eyed just thinking about it even now. Now that I know he is safe and sound and okay. I guess I am not that safe and sound or okay. I don't know what it is with me.
YD had a class to go to last night. Dozer is a whiney little boy when YD isn't around, so she didn't want to leave him by himself. (It's my version of getting to watch the grandkids) She called and told me she was going to drop him off, and I said fine, but I wouldn't be home until later. That was okay, she has a key.
I got home, expecting Dozer to be at the house with my two furbabies. I pulled up and they were all singing at the top of their lungs. Dozer's a natural leader when it comes to howling, everyone joins in. I came in the house and my two greeted me, the back door was wide open and Dozer was no where in sight. I PANIC-ed! I also had to go over the hill to pay a bill and had no time to really look for him. He has a tendency to wander about and look for YD. He adores his girl! I drove around a couple of blocks, then a couple of more blocks, and didn't see him. I had to get over the hill, and decided that I would look more when I got home.
I got over there and back as soon as I could, stopped to pick up a few things I needed at the grocery store and headed home. The whole time dreading that I would still not be able to find him.
I pull up to the house, and hear the singing again. I'm thinking my damned dogs are taunting me. They never make these kinds of noises unless Dozer is with them. I come in the house, and here's Dozer! I just completely fell apart. I kept asking him where he came from and crying and petting him and hugging him. And asking him more where he came from. He was very obliging in getting all up on me and whining with me and wagging his tail and giving kisses. I felt like a goof, breaking down like that, but I couldn't help myself. I love this dog to bits. He is so sweet and we had a heck of a time getting him back from some mean people when my daughter was gone last year.
What had happened was that YD was running behind while I was running behind. She got to the house later than I thought she would and hadn't even been here by the first time I got home. I came in, lost it, thought I lost Dozer and left to go look for him and then go over the hill. While I was out looking, she came by dropped him off and left. We had to have missed each other by mere seconds! I am still traumatized by it.
When she got back from her class I told her what I had done and I got a hug from her for it and a promise to make sure that if she ever drops him off again, she will make sure that he can't get out of the house. And I tried to promise that I wouldn't worry so damned much, cause I know that is part of my problem here. I can't help it.

Tuesday, March 03, 2009

It's the 3rd?!?

I don't know where I have been! I know I have been sick, but I thought it was just a day. Last I remember, I took OD and party out to dinner...damn I have been that sick I guess. Yesterday all I wanted to do was die. Really! I literally kept telling myself that the pain I was feeling was all the good stuff in my body doing battle with the bad stuff in my body and the good stuff would win out sooner or later. (praying desparately for sooner) It's "just" respiratory thing, but man, I have never felt this much pain all over in my life. I knew Saturday night, when we were on our way to dinner, that I was getting something. I had that itchy, scratchy throat thing going on. Sunday, I spent most of the day thinking that I could have made it through work, but didn't try because in my older, wiser years decided that they don't pay me enough to try too hard. Heaven forbid I should have gone to work, because I got enough rest Sunday to help me survive Monday. Today I feel better. Whatever battle was being fought yesterday is done, I just hope the whole war is over. But I am not going to push myself.
I'm going to try to get my bedding washed and dried and make my bed, so that later I can take a good hot shower and crawl back into a nice clean bed. We'll see just how far I get. It's hard for me to just stand long enough to make a cup of tea.




I did sit still on the couch covered with my big fuzzy blanket and do my stitching. I got quite a bit done and that was the main reason I blogged today. I wanted to show it off. I wish my picture wasn't so out of focus.

Hope you all are doing good!