Tuesday, January 27, 2009

I hate Cal-e-for-ne-a!

Actually I love my state, I hate the guy that pronounces it that way. (See title)
Every two years we have to get our cars smog checked. No big deal. Really. NO BIG DEAL! I took my little s10 up this morning to get it's smog checked or rather it's lack of smog checked. This is about a five to fifteen minute process. I had a coupon to keep my cost down. $50 out the window as far as I am concerned, but I like to stay as close to legal as possible, so I don't have hassles. Read that again, I don't like HASSLES! My truck has an exhaust leak. Something I wouldn't know about just by driving it. So they can't do a smog check today. No biggy. Really. I'll take care of it.
What effing pisses me off is that I went over to pay my registration, which needs to be paid by the 31st, so as not to be illegal. I asked for a temporary tag, so that the cops know I paid my registration and that I just have some issues to fix up. The lady in back of the counter tells me, that will be $50! I just paid $85 to register my damned truck and you want $50 more to give me a 3" x 4" piece of paper that says, "This person is taking care of business so please don't hassle her"? Sorry I have to let loose with this...FUCK THAT!
I told her I would take my chances. She told me I could come back with a note from the smog tester guy that says my smog failed and she will issue me a free pass to drive the vehicle to have it repaired. Okay, I need to drive twenty miles, to get permission to drive that twenty again, plus twelve more to have my mechanic fix the problem and then drive the thirty two miles back to give the lady all the paperwork, oh yea not to mention, after stopping by the smog check only station to have them test the truck. (And hopefully have it pass) Again, sorry, FUCK THAT!
Last time I had the truck done, it was $32 to test and $8 for the certificate. Then hopped on over to DMV paid my $50 to register. This time with a coupon, it was going to be $50 to test, certificate included, and $85 for registration.
Now, I have to come up with money for the repairs. I have to wait until at least the 3rd of February to have the money to do the repairs. As long as they aren't too expensive.

Monday, January 26, 2009

Another good week...weight wise

I don't know how this happened. I am down another 1.8 pounds! I shouldn't question it, but then I am trying to change my life style and I need to analyse everything I put in my mouth and eventually (but hopefully not) on my hips.
Apparently, right now I guess I am doing everything right. I suppose that I am more mindful of what I am eating, but I haven't been playing close attention. This week was an emotional one for me. As in my earlier post you can see that the girls are giving me fits. It's all over my YD who has some troubles and her sisters cannot figure out why I choose to "favor" her over them. I can't explain it to them so that they understand. YD is moving out again. I can't stop her, cause if she doesn't move out her nasty sisters will make things impossible. Don't ask me why they choose to do this. They have their lives fairly on track now and I have warned them that if their behavior keeps up I will derail them and they will have to fix their own damned tracks. Harsh? Yes, but they are old enough now to stop their little two and three year style tantrums. Enough boo hooing.
I ate what I WANTED to eat this past week. Wrong. I should have been eating what I NEEDED to eat. I still managed to lose some pounds. I feel a little embarrassed that I lost, because I was sure that there would be a big + on my scales! I wish I knew what I had done right, so I could keep up with that.
Maybe it is because I ate what I wanted and then got right back on with the program instead of beating myself up and continuing to eat wrong. Maybe I excercised a little more than I thought and earned the extra calories. I just wish I knew. I DO know that I am an emotional eater and I need to watch for that. Soon. Cause I can totally derail my new lifestyle if I allow myself to continue with the stuffing of feelings.
I did learn that I need to keep some goodies in the house at all times. By goodies I mean, I need to keep Skinny Cow ice cream treats. They are designed to taste great without all the calories. Those 100 calorie packs are great if ya need a chocolate fix. I get the Oreo wafers. 100 Calories, 2 grams of fat. I can eat one pack and satisfy my craving for chocolate. Another good thing for me is plain ol' graham crackers. For an afternoon pick-me-up, a couple of those with a smidgen of peanut butter, I am good til dinner.
So, I have learned some good things about myself. I need to continue to learn and practice the lessons that I find helpful.
If I could just get myself to crave water 6-8 galsses worth, I'd get there a lot faster!
I'm going to get on my Wii Fit after I am done with this post. I am only managing to get on it once or twice a week, because when I get home from work the knees and the hips are not happy with me. I know that when I have lost enough weight, those will like me much better and then I can excercise more.
Thank for reading my rantings and ravings. If there are any good suggestions out there for anything I could do better, please comment...even if you feel highly critical of what I am doing, please spill it!
Love you guys!

And to add to what I said about the drama: I just got a phone call from YD. She has gotten herself a nice little room on the ranch where she works! She can have her dog there, and the rent is only $200 a month...utilities paid. Her commute is about five minutes walking or maybe even just sauntering over. The best thing about it is that I know she is safe there, she is secure, she will be fed by a momma who is a Mexican lady and cooks like you would never believe. I think I will have to put YD on my WW program with me after a while! She got approval by the two woman who have to approve these things for her. (Besides me) Best yet...I am relieved. Now, I am going to tell the other two, that since I am not getting the monetary help that I was going to get from YD, they will have to pick up the slack. Rent here will be $200 a month, and they will hae to clean the kitchen, front room and bathroom at least once a week. If I have to make a little kindergarten chart for them to make sure that they do what they need to do I will. I can get gold silver and black stars at work to put on their little charts. Act like a 5 year old = getting treated like a five year old! So there! Neh!

Sunday, January 25, 2009

Blah, blah, blah

Yep, that's the feeling from this house. The girls are battling again. I now have TWO Princesses and one slightly crazy, but also slightly down to earth child. Do you all think it might be too late to take them to that safe drop off for children in Nebraska? I mean they are all in their twenties...maybe they will be accepted. At least one thing would be, they would be in Nebraska and I would be back here in CA.
Or - I could just run away from home. Believe me, I have thought about doing this before. I just never knew where I would go and how would I go there? I need money to run away!
Ziggy has been placed with another family. It's a good thing I wasn't totally attached to him. (I lie) But he was becoming a big bone of contention around here and something had to give. So, YD found a family that just went ga-ga when she said that they could have him if they wanted. The mom was so happy! That makes me happy too. Zigs won't have other dogs to play with, but he will have a couple of kids.
OD and MD seem to think that I favor YD and they are a little jealous. I told them they are all old enough to work through those feelings of jealousy, but they want to hold onto their three year old feelings. I have been trying to help them get out on their own for a while now. YD had a set back and needed a little more help, even though she is the one who is more independant. So I told them. From now on MOM is closed. If I can't help them ALL, I refuse to help any of them. I QUIT!!!!!
No rides, no food, no housing. Get the F**K out! We'll see how this goes. Of course, I got the teen aged "Well, if you don't do that, I won't do this." I said "Fine, go ahead and cut your noses off to spite your faces."
I have been going back and forth between being pissed, depressed, sad, lonely, but one thing stays steady...TIRED. I am drained.
I will work through this. I thought everything was fine after my last bout of drama with the Drama Queens, but I was wrong. At least I have work, where the drama there is contained, somewhat.

Monday, January 19, 2009

Lots O' Good Stuff!

Good stuff #1: It's MONDAY!!! I know, for those of you who deem Mondays as the start of your work weeks, I am truely sorry. But look at it this way; when I am having the start of my work week, you'll be half way through with yours!
Good stuff #2: It is continuing to cool off here. I think today will be actually bearable. Maybe 67 at the highest temp. I am still so sorry for those of you who have to dig out. I could not do that and I honor you.
Good stuff #3: 2.2 pounds of me is missing! I am NOT going and looking for that part of me that has gone by the wayside. It can stay on the wayside. This week I do not know how I did that. I kind of went beserk eating things that should not have passed these lips. I think it was the Saturday and Sunday heavy weight lifting at work that did it. I cleaned receiving. (Imagine 100 foot rolls of welded wire fencing - they are not what you would call light)
Good stuff #4: Camera is back working. It did need a new battery and the batteries I put in it that I thought were fresh were most likely old. No body in this house seems to know that when batteries die, you do not bury their remains in the top drawer of the desk where the fresh batteries are. I got new batteries for it this morning and wa-la! PICTURES happen!
Good stuff #5: I got my first section of my cross stitch project done this morning. It is a tiny little 1.5" x 1.5 inch square, but it took me three evenings of stitching to get it done. Mind you though, I have little short spurts of time in between commuting people here and there to work on it. I like how it turned out. This square I did in a deep plum-ish color. At least I think it's plum-ish. The rest of the squares will be done in different rich jewel tones.

Please excuse the wrinkles. I am on to the next section which is the square at the top right side of this whole stitch.

And one more Good stuff:

Ziggy sleeping. Which these days is a GOOD thing, because he is turning into a little terror. The others dogs look at me as if to say, "Please! Can we have a timeout?!?"

Saturday, January 17, 2009

Comon Monday!

Will it ever be Monday?
(for those of you knitting your brows, my Monday is like your Saturday..if you have a regular workweek)
This week has gone on for like a month.
I don't know why.
Let's just say, I am over it already!
Did my taxes last night from the federal list of free tax programs.
That's a fine story.
I'll tell ya when my week is over, if it EVER GETS OVER!
That is all.....

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Back at it

I finally, finally got back into stitching! YAY!
I did not pick up where I left off, because I am not sure where that was. I did however start a SMALL sampler. I wish I had my camera all fired up and ready to take pictures, but then again, right now there is nothing much to show. Only the square that surrounds the whole thing, in a deep, deep almost black, blue.
Hopefully, before I get too far on this, I will be able to take some pics.
If any of you get "The Gift of Stitching" online, it is the sampler from their March 2007 issue. (But not in those colors)

Monday, January 12, 2009

Today's post is brought to you by the number 3

It's a good number!
This morning's weigh in gave me a -2.6 pounds, bringing my total weight loss to 3 whole pounds.
Yes, I am much happier than last week. I recommend getting a nasty cold if you want to lose weight. It turns out that all this coughing 24 hours a day can burn calories much faster than running a coupla miles. Well, that and no appetite to speak of. Tea has been on the main menu for DAYS.
Whew Hoo! I am gonna be thin to win! I am on my way. Yay me! Now, if I could just get rid of this cough...

Saturday, January 10, 2009

I cant breedth tru my dnose

Yup. It's what happens when you spend 5 hours in a county emergency center, and a few hours in a closed up truck with a sick person. (It was really cold out or I would have had the windows open)
I managed to get through Wednesday and Thursday at work. I made it for the opening of the doors yesterday, but after three hours, I decided I had just about used up my patience. I managed to get my order faxed in though.
Came home, laid on the couch with some good TV and promptly fell asllep until 3:30. I guess I needed that. It looks like MD managed to share her crap with the rest of us. OD and YD both have it now. MD goes back to work today. I am planning on staying home again today and tomorrow, which will give me a good four days of not leaving the house. (My weekend is Monday, Tuesday)
OH HELL. I still have to get people to the buses and back. CRAP!

Tuesday, January 06, 2009

I had to...

Hallie, Where is Mr. Sock Monkey? I think this is his Mrs!


Monday, January 05, 2009

Not fantastic

Today was my weigh-in. I was disappointed, but I did lose. A whooping .4 pounds. I lost, so okay. This next week I will live a little closer to the program and try really, really hard not to fudge. No, no, I didn't eat fudge, I did eat See's Candy which might as well have been fudge. And my water intake has got to increase. I'm not a big fan of the water...so.
I am looking forward to how much better I can improve this next week. I sound enthusiastic now, don't I? Catch me about, say, Thursday. See what my enthusiam looks like then!

Oh hell! I just remembered that I only really followed program for the last 5 days...those other two days were spent studying the online thing and not eating right, so there's a good reason I only lost the .4. Whew!

New Record!!!

A few of you benefited from my wonderful comments between the hours of Midnight and 2AM earlier today. I babbled on with great confidence. I would probably be embarrassed to go back and read what I wrote.
Then this morning I have found that I have broken an old record! I got less than 3 hours of sleep! YAY! Me!
Y'all heard that MD was sick yesterday, or was it the day before? She wasn't too sick to take control of the couch, TV Remote and the relative cleanliness of my front room. While I was at work yesterday she called to ask if I could take her to the doctor when I got home, cause she was having some trouble breathing. I rolled my eyes and said a begrudging yes. You don't know how many times I have had this same conversation with her over the years. It was slow at work, so I told the boss I was leaving an hour early to take MD to the doctor.
Let me explain: When we say, "Take her to the doctor", we mean go to the county hospital and sit in a waiting room anywhere from 4.5 hours to 12 hours. I'm sure that y'all have heard the horrors of the state or county hospitals where the taxpayers support the staff and everybody and their brothers (and sometimes their entire families) show up when they have hang nails, or the sniffles or something even as tragic as an actual super contagious, fast spreading, horrific disease. Some of these people even have some real mental issues, which they are not shy about talking to you and everyone else within, say, a ten mile radius about. And drunks, whose friends have tired of and drop off at the entrance under the guise of "finding a parking space".
Yeah. That place! Hmmm, I always look forward to a few dozen hours there on my "Friday night".
We got down there at 5:15 and proceeded to watch a wonderful cross section of societies' finest stroll through. I guess Sunday evening is a quieter time for county "emergencies", there were only 30 - 40 people ahead of us. And Yay that the weather is cold, cause those waiting rooms can get about 15 degrees warmer inside than the temperature outside. MD got checked in and then went over to the window where they ask the real questions, and got her little band, so they don't lose her somewhere in the bowels of the hospital. This process only took two hours. We waited another hour and a half to two hours and they called her in. I love babies screaming and little kids running around me in an effort to entertain themselves. Yeah.
They finally called her into the actual ER. This is where I told her I'd be back in a few, cause I was ready to pass out from hunger. I went and got some food. Got back to the ER in about 45 minutes and sat and read for another hour and a half. She came out, with instructions, and a prescription, so we had to find a 24 hour pharmacy. Great fun!
We did all we had to do and got home around 11:45. So 6.5 hours all told. Not too bad for county.
In the meantime, it was so cold and while I was out, needed a warm drink and the only one readily available was coffee. Now I can drink black tea til the cows come home and I will sleep like a baby. Give me a teaspoon of coffee, it's a no go. Not sleeping, not even thinking about sleeping. I managed to finally fall asleep around 2:30 in the morning. I knew I was going to hate myself today!
MD has bronchitis. She will be off work for the next three days. I'm sure the grocery store where she works is happy about that. No one really wants somebody in the back coughing over their meat and seafood!
And of course this morning I had to be up at the crack of dawn to take YD to the bus stop.
I see a little nap in my future!

Saturday, January 03, 2009

I need you!

I can so tell that I need you guys! I mean, I knew that before, but it is so evident now. I read back through the last few days' posts and the comments, and y'all made such encouraging comments. You made me feel better and that I CAN do this.
Today was a little better. I did slip up yesterday and today, because some really nice customer left a box of See's Candy at the service counter, and of course I could not pass that up. See's Candy...the breakfast of chumpions. (yes, I did spell it like that)
But like I said before, I will not be beating myself up. So I ate the candy, enjoyed it and moved on. Soon all the niceness of our customers during the holiday fattening up season will pass, and I will no longer be tempted. Ach...no matter.
I had planned on coming home and turning on the Wii and get in a few licks. MD has been sick for a little over a week (yet she and friends could drive the length of the state to Los Angeles for a freakin' concert for New Year's Eve and drive back all in three days time. She didn't go to work, so parked her arse on my couch and took complete control of my bigger than life TV. I mean ABSOLUTE control. Not any kind of talking could get her to give up the remote. Plus, since she was gone partying and not here to take possession of the old TV, it is still in the front room and there's not much for floor space and rolicking with the Wii Fit. Damn! Best laid plans....
Maybe the day after tomorrow. That's my weigh in day. I get to see how I have done.

Friday, January 02, 2009

I wish I could eat less!

I am not going to keep this up, the complaining, I mean.
I spent today, well, working for the most part, but I planned out what I wanted/needed to eat. I took plenty of food with me to work so I wouldn't be tempted to buy my daily fix of White Cheddar Cheez-its. (Wonder why I am over weight?)
I have now finished eating my dinner and put my food into the points tracker online and I still.have.7.5.points.to.eat! Crap, I don't really WANT to eat anything else, but their "studies have shown" that if you follow "the plan", you will lose the weight.
I know, it's a conspiracy to make me sick of eating, so I stop eating. Well, it won't work. I will continue to eat. If I went off the plan, I would be eating all the crap I can get my hands, mouth, and teeth on. I am addicted to eating crap.
I will stick to this plan, I will eat everything I am supposed to eat, and I will like it...RIGHT? I'm gonna try, I promise.

Thursday, January 01, 2009

The New Year

Happy New Year everyone! Thanks for reading my dull, bitchy blog posts this year. I hope to have something more entertaining this year, but who knows, I may be just as I was last year!
I think my trusty little cheap camera took a shit. Maybe just the batteries, but I changed them and they lasted a day...I only took two pictures, but I am going to have to poll the rest of the household to see if anyone else snapped a few (or a lot). The evidence is in the camera, which will not turn on, so I can't find out! So, pictureless posts til further notice.
Okay, I HATE New Year's resolutions, so I didn't make any, BUT, I am making some changes in my life. Or rather I am attempting some changes in my life.

1) I have joined WeightWatcher's Online
Today is the start of that. I am cleaning out the refrigerator. Scrubbing it. That ought to make me really sick of food. I am throwing out all but the essentials for healthy eating. Then I will be making a list of foods that will only help me in my endeavor. I am buying those foods today, and then I am making an awesome WeightWatcher's dinner to celebrate the coming in of 2009.

2) I have joined FlyLady.
This one I will really, really have a time with. I hate cleaning, I hate organizing. I would rather mess up and sit around and watch TV, or play my Wii, or sit at the computer. (Could be one of the main reasons I need WeightWatcher's, ya think???)

3) I AM going to start stitching again. I have been really lazy about it and I miss sitting and relaxing and just creating something. (Perhaps all the sitting at the computer, or playing Wii, or watching TV has taken away from my need to sit and relax...relax? From WHAT?!?)

So, here and now, I am taking on some new habits. If I get them to work 21 days in a row, I may have the new ways zoned in for the year. Wish me luck please. And I will be answering to those of you who want to get on my case about not doing what I need to do. (Cause I know you will all do that in a caring sort of way)
I have 90 pounds to lose. I will lose it in the way WeightWatchers.com suggests and I will mess up at times. This I know about myself, BUT the difference this time is that I refuse to beat myself up over this. Who wants to look at an old woman all bruised, because she messed up?!?
So, here I go...........