Thursday, January 31, 2008

Sick and Tired

I may not be able to post for a while. My computer has the flu, or something. I got home from work yesterday to everyone in my house moping around like they just lost their best friends. Do we depend on this machine too much or what? I got to spend my evening poking around in there, like I knew what I was doing. Turns out what we need is a brain surgeon, not a nurse practioner here. I thinkI am going to take it to the Geek Squad, that is unless they charge and arm and a leg.
Doing this at work is okay, if there aren't many people hovering, but usually there is a BUNCH of people hanging out at the computer banks instead of being downstairs where they should be, so I won't be blogging until the Geek Squad - or - whoever rescues my poor sickly puter.
Hope to see you sooner than soon!

Wednesday, January 30, 2008

Shorty McShort Short

Yes short. I have to leave for work in five minutes.
My class rocked last night! We had a really great time. We did some new processes and worked on the things we started last week, and now they look more like they are supposed to look. Thursday we get to work on them finishing up and then on to bigger and better stuff.
This class is going to do me some wonders, I can tell. The snacky things??? Well, even though they were there and we knew about them, they never left my bag. We were that engrossed in what we were doing. Cool enough!
Off to work I go. It's order day. I love order day. I get to spend other people's money, and a lot of it. Of course, when the stuff comes in, I have to find places for the new things and enter them in the computer and tag them, etc, etc. Oh well, it's all in the name of "job security".
More later, I'm sure today has some great things to write about in it.

Tuesday, January 29, 2008

My Sunday

I am so tempted to just lay around today. Already I have been fussing with this computer for an hour and a half. It is trying to tell me...just take it easy. See? Even inanimate objects don't want to do anything. (like they would anyway...DUH!)
It's so cold here. Not like your cold back east, but like our cold here in the west, and they are telling us on the TV that we have another batch of rain coming through. All the way into Friday when we get a break and then Saturday, kaboom, another day of wet.
I got the rest of the rug up yesterday. I was thinking about taking the three bags of trash I made out of that room, plus a few more from the back yard up to the dumps. The first of many. I don't know how up to that I really am though. Got a bad case of the lazies. I started trying to figure out what is going to get up the adhesive from the padding under the rug. I tried DeSolve it already and that could work, but I'd like to get it up sometime in the next five years. The DeSolve it worked, but it took about ten minutes of messing with it and that was just a patch about 3 inches square, and I'm not quite sure that all the adhesive is all up from that spot. I think once I find something that will work a little quicker, I will be more into doing the room again. Unfortunately, that is the way I am. I will stall and stall until I come up with a solution and then go gang busters with it.
We do have our Ceramics class tonight. I am excited about that. I hate leaving my house, so I am struggling with that part of it, but once I am there I am all in it. Last Thursday, my daughter was tired and tried to whine and complain about half way through the class. I just told her to buck up and go with it, I am having fun and I didn't want her ruining it for me. Tonight I will take some snacky things, so she can munch on something to get her energy back up. Maybe that will make it better for both of us. Thursdays are a long day for both of us. She has class all day and I work that day. But this is supposed to be fun!
Laundry is calling. Gotta go finish that up. Whoopdeedoo!

Sunday, January 27, 2008

More Progress

I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop. My youngest left a "nice" message. It was that she would pick up her mail sometime in the future, because she was sure she had more then what I had told her about. I replied to her saying that I would tell her about all her mail because I didn't want her to miss something that may be important to HER. She messaged back that she would come by Saturday, because she was working all days every day til then. And....ta da...Thank you. What a boon to my feelings! She actually said thank you to me! It's small, but at least I know there is still some semblance of human beingness in her. She is not 100% monster. I don't have an overwhelming sense of doom in this other shoe dropping thing. I think it's just my nerves. Years ago, when I had this feeling, it was an overwhelming sense of doom and well, it turned out my instincts were right. But that's a story for another day and it's R rated for yuckiness in content.
On other fronts, I am looking forward to two full days off. They will be spent inside because the weather is being a butthead. Rain and wind. I am giving myself a few hours or so to visit with my friend tomorrow. We haven't seen each other or talked for quite a while. I was so pleased when she called out of the blue the other day. Tomorrow we will meet at Starbucks. She is bringing her 9 y/o son with her. I enjoy visiting with him too, he is quite the character. I have known him since he was two.
I am determined to pull the rest of that dang rug up, then experiment with different solutions to see what gets the adhesive off the floor the easiest and best way. I'm going to try to get my tall ladder into the garage so it can dry off. I can use that to pick the stars off the ceiling. (that just sounds funny, doesn't it?) Sounds like a country song. I'll pick the stars off the ceiling for you dear...cause for you the ceiling should be clear... okay, I won't quit my day job.
I feel antsy for some reason tonight. I wish I could figure it out. I have felt this way since I got home. It's not the message from my daughter cause I didn't read that until about 8 tonight. I wish I knew. I should try to get some sleep, big plans ahead of me, I need to start off on the right foot. I let ya know my progress tomorrow!

Saturday, January 26, 2008


They worked on my closed road early this morning and got it open for me...just for me. See? I am special! LOL!

Sometrhing old is new again.

"The boyfriend" and daughter surprised me when I came home tonight. I think they wanted to change the mood in the house. I have been a little cranky lately. Could it be tax woes, income woes, time constraints, what?!? I really don't know, but my daughter keeps blaming it on "the change". Now, that is getting my goat. Which means it is probably the case. But it's feeling like when you are not in a good mood and a man comes along and says, "Oh are you PMS'ing?" HATE that! All I know is that I want out of this mood and I want out of it you hear me? NOW! Well, I went off on a tangent, didn't I? Geez!
The surprise: Boyfriend cleared off the entire book shelf I had built years ago and then promptly loaded up with sundry items. They washed it down and started putting things back up in some semblance of order. Oh hell, now I will never find anything! The one thing that came out of it that was really great, was that they found a CD of mine I had "misplaced". It's Beethoven. In particular..Moonlight Sonata. I love, love, love that piece. Now I have to put my walkman back in my truck with the little adapter thingy so I can listen to Beethoven on my way home from work. This will change my mood for sure. I am listening to it as I write. Somehow it makes me type faster. I am just so grateful they found it.
They also picked up some BBQ somewhere and shared it with me. They told me they made a firepit in the backyard and cooked. Oh yea, right! (snicker) My daughter is out with some friends for a little while and is bring me back some ice cream from Cold Stone. Have any of you heard of that place? OMG! Ice Cream heaven. It's expensive, so it's one of those every great once in a while treats. I told her to surprise me but make it chocolatey. I hope I can stay awake long enough to enjoy it tonight.
Tomorrow is my Friday. I will spend my weekend just puttering around and picking away at all the little things that need to be done. I think I will try to get the rest of that rug up. I just want it done. Then I need to start picking away at all the junk that is on the ceiling. (The glow in the dark stars the girls put up when they were younger. So many little nit picky things to do, but it's getting there. At least I am seeing progress.
Oh and speaking of progress...I left a message on my youngest daughter's MySpace telling her that she had a tax form here from one of her jobs, what did she want me to do with it. I was expecting a snotty remark, but she just said, hang on to it, I'm sure I have other mail and I will pick it up later. Hmmm, seems she may have calmed down a bit...YAY!!!

Friday, January 25, 2008

Short but Sweet (maybe)

I always start with something in short but sweet. Then it turns into long and arduous. I'm pooped tonight, so I think the first is what will happen. Went to our Ceramics class last night. It was FUN! We got to make three things to break ourselves in to the wonderful world of ceramics. Of course, true to myself, I wanted everything PERFECT. I made myself stop that and just enjoyed the feel of the clay and the ability to manipulate it to some form other than a square block. Our first attempts had us using about 2/3 of the first bag of clay. So after class we had to go buy another for next week. If we keep this up, this will end up being an expensive habit! (But fun and healthy!)
Our wonderful (NOT) weather is back. Today it poured on us. Can you say POURED??? OMG!
One of my coworkers called me over to a door that leads to what I call the meat locker, because of the temperature. It has a half wall that we share with the business next door. The wall is about 10 feet tall. It used to be the outside of the building. ANY way. She was getting spritz with water when she started out there, which shouldn't happen. It's totally enclosed from the outside now. I looked to see where the water was coming from and it was gushing through a vent in the roof to where it was supposed to be going, but there was so much rain coming down that the vent and drain system couldn't handle it. There was a good sized indoor waterfall, but it was not a good thing! The water leaked down the inside wall to the store and started flooding one of the aisles. What excitement. I called the managers down and then called the manager of the lumber yard next door and told him what was going on. They had to get up on the roof to clear what was causing all the back up and waterfall. Excitement done.
Then about 3, my GM called me to come upstairs to the office. As usual I felt guilty, but I didn't know, about what...I got up there and she had this look on her face... like...oh God, what did I do??? So I asked. She said nothing. I just heard the road you take home is closed and I want to you to find out if it is or not, so you don't go out of your way! She's so cool. I spent the rest of my day up there playing on the computer, cause it took me that long to get the information. And sure enough the road was closed, so I had to go the long way. About double my usual trip. Before I actually got out the door, I heard different people saying you might as well stay at our house tonight, the other road is closed too. Well, hell, that ain't gonna keep me from home and my furbabies. I told them I would try the road and give them a call and let them know what was going on. Yes, there was so much water in so many places going across the road, but they didn't close it. Phew! It meant I had to drive on a busy and fast freeway, which makes my little country self shudder at the thought, but every one was basically behaving themselves and driving right. We are supposedly in for a doozy tonight, but I'm hoping that what we had this afternoon was the doozy and we're off the hook again. I don't know how long my regular road will be closed. Last time it was down for five months. This could make me crazy.
Okay long to go do things.

Wednesday, January 23, 2008


Today was not a great day. I got through it okay and made it go slower by watching the damn clock. I just wanted it over. This type of day is the kind where I wish I worked in some little corner office, with no interaction with other people. I needed that T-shirt that says "Does not play well with others" I tried really hard to make everyone else's day crappy. I wish I could have stayed home.
Because I had to get on that room yesterday and pull up half the rug, I was in pain last night trying to sleep. Actually trying to turn over. Every time I turned my hip yelled at me in the worst way. So, I got up on the wrong side of the bed, and carried it with me throughout the day. My sales rep came early. I was by no means ready for him. If he has to wait he bugs all the other employees, asking them to tell me that he's there. So I got about 6 calls on the radio..."Your reps here" I need to hear it only once and I responded with "I will be there as soon as I can"...but no, I have to be told 5 extra times. It takes me even longer to prepare the order for him, and I'm not all that sure that I got everything on there I wanted. So, I let him have it. "You are early, I can't get to the order til 9:30 and it takes a while to make sure the order is right. You are just too early." So, he promised me some free stuff for my ceramics class to appease me. It did.
The day finally got over. I have been giving a co worker a ride home on Wednesdays and Thursdays. He can't pay for gas. No biggy, it's not like I go way out of my way to get him to his house. Tonight, I said I just wanted to go home and have a fire, but there's no firewood. So, he chopped up a few rounds of firewood and put them in my truck. I think that so pays for his rides home!
My little old lady cranky next door neighbor started giving the daughter's boyfriend a bad time about a half an hour before I got home. As he was standing out there listening to her crank out her complaints about my yard, the big dog got out the front door. As I was coming around the corner to my house I saw the boyfriend with dog in hand (his collar) headed toward our house. Of course the hair went up on my neck. My dog can't be in the front! There's too much traffic. I calmed myself down before I said anything. This guy knows how I feel about my critters and would not do anything to harm them (God forbid). It was all innocent, and basically cause the dog wouldn't listen to him. He's done it to me, so I can't get upset. The complaint that the neighbor had was that my two pallets are leaning up against her fence. OMG!!! They have been there FOR.EVER. Besides they were only leaning on my side of the fence and they don't drink or smoke or have loud parties. They are very innocent pallets. He very politely moved them. Man, he's a nice kid! I would have just knocked them over if she said that to me.
Ha Ha Ha ...I just remembered something I did. I will surely go to hell for it, but damn it was fun!
A little history: The cranky neighbor's sister used to own this house. They bought them together one weekend when their husbands were out hunting together or something like that. The sister's relationship did not last a lifetime. They ended up not speaking to each other after a while. (Now I know why) Or if they spoke it was argumentative. This sister that owned this house had okay landscaping. Not great, but who am I to talk? I grow pallets in my front yard. Well, there is this bottle brush tree at the shared fence in the back yard. After we had been here for two years the cranky one started literally bitching at me about how the leaves from my tree were clogging up her gutters. I said have your sons put gutter guards on. She didn't and continued complaining to me about it. After I had heard that for a year, I decided to "fix" it. I cut all the leaves off the tree, leaving the 2" or bigger branches on the tree. It was a tree skeleton. Then I proceeded to collect windchimes and hang them in the bare branches. I got some very nice windchimes. Very classy ones. The windchime tree was really pretty, and noisy. But she couldn't complain anymore, I fixed the gutter clog problem for her. Is that mean or what? Now the windchimes are gone and the leaves are back. I prefer to give the birds a place to hide from the cats.
My ceramics class is going to be fun. I already have ideas for the different projects we need to do to learn the processes. I can't wait to go back on Thursday.

Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Short Update

WOW! I am doing two posts in one day and I just realized that this is my 100th post. Not that it is a huge deal, but I am posting more and more, and it is starting to add up. YAY me! How excited are you all? (snicker, just kidding, snicker)
I finally kicked myself in the behind to get myself started on that room. I got half the rug up. That really is a feat for me. I have arthritis in my hips and a slight problem with my back. So doing anything other but sitting a spell, walking a spell, and standing a spell is hard labor. I was down on my hands and knees on and off for the last few hours. I have moved what "furniture" is in there over to the bare floor side in anticipation of what I will accomplish next Monday. (My next day off) The part of the floor that didn't receive water damage (not as bad as I thought at first), and the part that they brushed glue on to hold down the padding are really the only bad spots on the floor. Of course that is quite a bit of area. I really wish they hadn't used glue. I may be able to get it up. It is kind of a shame to cover the hardwood. I wish I knew I could do it justice to patch up the warped spots, cause I would just do that. I'd save a lot of money. We'll see, I will ask some of my customers that know more about this sort of thing.
That's it. I need to go get cleaned up for my class. A friend who I haven't spoken to for a wile just called to chat a little. It was good to hear from her. We made a date to get together next Monday afternoon for coffee. I got friends coming out of the woodwork! Feels good.

I Can't Believe I Ate The Whole Thing!

We had dinner at our friends' place last night. She made Hallie's favorite...That chicken thing. But it didn't look like Hallie describes it. It was drier if ya know what I mean. And scrumptious! We also had this absolutely sinful cheese bread, and some noodles and steamed veggies. Oh yea, my oldest daughter brought this dish that she and I enjoy. It's brown rice, sun dried tomatoes and garbanzo beans. For dessert we had little cheese cakes stars. (Because she only had these little star pans left over from Christmas to make the cheesecakes in. Cute! We all had our own little star cakes!
I overate, because it was all so dang tasty, I couldn't help myself. We of course laughed a lot and I brought a movie that they hadn't seen. "Practical Magic" I LOVE that movie. Probably have seen it fifteen times myself. If you haven't seen it yourself, indulge. It is a chick flick, so be warned. I left it for them to watch again, cause none of us could stop talking long enough for them to get the idea of the movie.
We got home just after 10PM, which is past my "bedtime". I feel like I was out drinking all night and all I had to drink was a delicious mug of hot tea.
I couldn't get on the computer long enough yesterday to do any damage anywhere. It was acting up and being slow and stubborn. My middle daughter probably has all kinds of downloads on here that she was told not to do. AARRGGHH!!!! I want my own computer in my room, locked up and be selfish about it. I can't afford to get a new one any time soon, this one will have to be "the one" for a long while. I'm keeping my fingers crossed.
Lena, my oldest daughter and I are starting a ceramics class tonight at the local community college. We tried to get in last semester. I got in, she got on a wait list with about ten other people. She was at the bottom of the list. By the time the teacher got towards the bottom of the list, there was a young lady there who was trying to finish up a few credits towards her degree. I gave her my spot, since we are only dong this for fun. I couldn't see the girl waiting a whole other semester to finish up three units! So, Lena and I signed up the same day this semester and got in, well above the wait list. We have been talking about doing this for a year or so. Since she is either working or going to class we don't do much together and it is important to me to share something together. Now we have two nights a week to get tired of each other. Plus all the fun things we can make. I have a kiln here. It's not hooked up. I need to get a little information under my belt and see just how this is all going to work, before I invest in the electrician coming out and changing wiring for that thing. I think he may only have to change the outlet, I have the 220V for it, but the amperage is wrong, so the outlet is wrong. I may have to spring for a new circuit breaker. If I don't totally suck at creating ceramic objects, I will share my progress. If I suck, then well, I'll just be mentioning that, you won't be made to suffer. I can't wait! I'm so excited!

Sunday, January 20, 2008

Sunday? Friday? Eh...Just Another Day!

It's my Friday! Woo hoo! Although the week has not been a bad week, I am glad it is over again. I love my weekends, so I can hole up in my house and do what I want. Monday night I have a date with the girls. Jacquie is making Chicken Marsala for dinner and I am going there to eat, laugh and do crafty type things. I love those girls. There's an apartment full of them. the youngest is 18 and Jacquie is going to be 30 in a few days. It's something different for me, I rarely leave my house to go to anyone's home, except if it a family birthday or something like that.
I spent a lot of time when I was in my twenties living in "alternative" living quarters. When I was rebellious, I lived in my car at the harbor. Sounds stupid doesn't it? That was before there were homeless people. My boyfriend and I were working on a fishing boat getting it ready to be put in the water, so we could fish commercially. When we finally launched it, we lived on the boat. After a year of that, we got another boat, and lived there for another four years. My boyfriend had a little problem and his little problem became very irritating to me, and since I was young and flighty, I left. Which left me homeless. I had bought a truck with a camper on it, so when I came home to my harbor town, I lived on the beach in my camper for two years. The officials run every one off now, you have to pay to stay anywhere now. I finally went to school to get some sort of skill that I could use other than in water, and got a "real" job. That lead to me buying a mobile home and then into this home. During the years I spent in the car, on the boat and in the camper taught me to live well by myself. There wasn't a lot of "hey come on over to my place and watch TV" or "come have dinner"...none of us who lived in those situations had much for space. I did a lot of reading (by kerosene lantern) and crafting. And playing a lot on the beach with my dogs..there was always room for the dogs. So, I suppose what is happening here is that I spent my formative years as a recluse and it is taking me a long time to get out of the habit. I'm not unhappy about it, but there are people that I want to spend time with away from work and I just have to get into the habit of visiting and being visited. It is fun, let me tell ya.
(I'm am also coming to the realization that having a full fledged house is a lot more work than a camper!!!)

Saturday, January 19, 2008

Nothing Much

I had nothing to say last night. I figured when I got up this morning I would be full of something. (Okay, yeah, I know, I am full of something, but that's not what I'm talking about) I finished two books last night, before I went to sleep. One of them, I had as my waiting room book. It was "Cold Fire" by Dean Koontz. Pretty good, except that it took me a long time to read it. Not many waiting room hours lately. I like that! It ended just like I figured it would, no surprises. Still good. I have read several of Den Koontz' books, but I think I will give him a rest for a while. My daughter scored a Stephen King book for me. It's Lissy's Story or something like that. She was in line somewhere and a lady behind her had the book in her hand. My daughter, Lena, asked how the book is and the lady told her she had just finished it and it was good. Lena said then I'll tell my mom, she likes Stephen King. The lady handed her the book and told her to give it to me! I think I will read that one next. I wish I knew who the woman was, so I could pay her back in kind, or at least thank her. My daughter did though.
The other book I finished, I read in about four nights. It was sent to me through the mail cause I must have got on some new mailing list. It's from a Christian book club. I took the book out of the package, but threw all the other stuff away. I kind of wish I hadn't now. It was an okay read. It was a Christian romance, called Rainbow's End. Of course it had all the trappings of a regular romance novel without all the frills and "hiney tingles" as Pioneer Woman would call them. The thing is, I thought oh this will be boring...then couldn't set it down. I read it when I went to bed every night. If anybody wants to try it, I'd be glad to send it along. Just let me know and we'll hook it up.
So much for not having anything to say. I managed, didn't I? Today is my late day at work. I am going to ask my GM if I can get that changed. I hate having to be there until 6PM. I like the late morning though! I'm more an early day person. Evenings are a waste to me if I get home at 6:30! It's dinner, shower and bed. Anyway, I'm off to work in a few. Hope your day is fantasic today. I'll see you all when I get home!

Thursday, January 17, 2008

Curiosity Killed the Cat

Well, not really, thank God. I love my cat. But I got curious before I went to work today and did a pre-tax return work up since I have all the parts together here. Should not have done that. I know I shouldn't be saying this but thank the powers that be, that my income is less than it was three years ago. Three years ago, I still had a deduction. One deduction, but that was enough to get me $10 bucks back from the tax season.
Last years taxes, I had been unemployed and had absolutely no money to speak of, and my deduction had grown up too much for me to put her info on my returns. I still ended up paying the feds $600! BECAUSE...I was unemployed and needed all the money from my unemployment checks to squeak by and didn't have them take out taxes. Well, my bad. I have been trying to pay them off, catch up with old bills, etc., etc.
So this morning I do the work up on my taxes and I have to PAY AGAIN!!!!! I had the accountant at work change my w2 to 0, zero, zilch, nada, nothing. (of course, after the fact) I am going to eat it for the rest of the year, just so I don't have to pay more the year after. What??? So they can bring in more people to give out money to and services to and let them have their babies for free. Okay, I know, this is a bad avenue I am going down, but damn, I cannot afford to live in this country anymore. I am literally at lower middle class income. God forbid I should have to pay rent. I am blessed in that area, I don't have too. Otherwise, I'd be Starvin' Marvin.
I got home from work to an envelope from the feds "Notice of Intent to Levy" I got behind in trying to pay back the taxes I owe from last year, so they are going to take it out of my paycheck. Crap. I'm not filing until midnight April 15th this year, so I can catch a breath.
I need to make more money, but I am kind of stuck in my capabilities. I didn't get enough college under my belt to merit doing more than I do right now. I have all kinds of experience in hardware, customer service, and retail, but this pays squat. I'm hearing people at work say, they need to find something different, because they are maxed out on income at this store. So now I have a ceiling over my head there too.
Any suggestions?
This is where I need to implement Kim over at Kim-D's, suggestion of Think Different. Hmmmmm....

Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Just Plain Tired

I wrote this whole big thing about how bad my day went, and when I reread it I decided like I sound like a dang whiner and I don't want to sound like that. I have been doing enough whining and it's time I shut myself up!

I hope you all had a great day! I will make mine better tomorrow! I hope!

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

Improvements Abound

My horoscope for today:
"Using flattery in order to get what you want in life is a completely legitimate tactic, there is no doubt about it. But if you use it too often, it will lose its value -- so consider yourself warned! Today, use flattery only as a last resort. The people you're with have become nearly immune to your flowery words and smiley eyes, so it will take every flattery arrow in your arsenal to get them to acquiesce. Why not try a simple 'please'? It might work better."

Last night I was going off about how wonderful my backyard is taking shape, how fantastic my daughter's boyfriend is, what fantastic progress he is making and how he has done it all without me even asking for all the energy he has put into the property here. I don't even have any suspicions about his motives. I believe that he is simply showing his appreciation for letting him stay here like he said. My middle daughter told me she thinks it's my karma. I have taken in a few young men that needed a place to stay and asked that in lieu of rent, could they please keep up the work in the backyard? Then when they leave, I am left with a bigger mess than before. At one point I shelled out $750 to clean up after some particularly messy young men moved out. I quit trying to help out, lost faith and said, never again. Only family members could occupy that cute little house in the back.

So now I read my horoscope. (don't worry, I only read them, not live by them) This one in particular made me nervous and I don't want to jinx my good fortune. Since the boyfriend knows how I am feeling about his work from my words yesterday, I am going to flatter him here, so I don't over-do the flattery, and deflate the meaning of it. Not that I have to ask him to do anything. He is taking the matter in his own hands. All the garbage that has piled up and then grown over with ivy has been separated from the plant growth and stacked where we can just load it on a truck and haul it off. It's stuff like old chairs and tables that my wonderful daughters found unusable and set outside to be hauled off. Then we never did that. That was either due to weather, time or money constraints, and it got out of hand. Some, my lazy middle daughter, just put stuff outside her door, and expected someone else (the maid perhaps) would just come pick it up. And some is my lack of ability to do yard work because of my back and hip problems. At any rate, it is looking so wonderful out there! I just might have to keep this kid around.

On the new crafty room front, I started pulling up the rug in there. UGH! I understand having rugs, but having rugs and animals is not the greatest combination. I pulled the rugs from most of the house after we had been here for a few years. I always have a bevy of critters around. Two of the bedrooms had been left alone. My youngest daughter had many animals of many types and the rug is a scrapbook of her critters! I am so glad to be able to finally take that out. Except that taking it out is going to take some time. I removed a five by three foot section. Now I need to get the pad up and the tack strips out. This part of the floor met with some water damage and the wood needs to be replaced. Since it's going to be a craft room, I would really rather just put in linoleum squares and have it easier to clean up. That way if I spill paint or glue, I can just wipe it up, and if I drop pins and needles I can just get out the magnet. A simple sweeping at the end of the day will clean up all materials and threads that may find their way down there. Once I get the rug up, I will pull out the warped section and replace it with plywood and then paint the walls and ceiling. After I do that I can put the linoleum down. I need to keep my eye on the prize and make myself take this in steps. I usually get excited about the end result and give up on all improvements and just dive into the purpose of rooms. This one I am GOING TO FINISH!

Monday, January 14, 2008

No Title

My imagination went south for the winter, so I can't think of a title. Who told me I had to have one anyway???

I got a call at work yesterday afternoon. It was the youngest daughter asking when I would be home. I told her and she said she was coming by to get her belongings. Mixed feelings there. UGH! I have to face her with my emotions still lingering on my sleeve. YAY! It will empty out the room. (I never got around to putting the stuff in the garage) Then again there was the mixture of I'm pissed and I'm hurt. Last but but least, the anxiety of how will she act? Oh, is my middle daughter going to be home or come home and what will happen if...I think I need to learn how to bottle the emotions and put a cork in it. Then let them out at a later time when, say the wind is blowing and they can dissipate out into the atmosphere. My stomach was churning.

She came and brought her one, long time friend who has gone through some real crap with and because of my daughter. She's a few years younger, and many times I was tempted to call and warn her parents about eminent things that I didn't feel were right. But her parents are a tad blind to what their daughters were doing and rarely want to hear that fact. For the most part I kept my mouth shut to them, but spoke up to the friend myself. Of course, that always fell on deaf ears.

She also brought a roll of garbage bags to pack up her stuff. When she came in I told her right away that I had packed up her belongings and labeled the boxes so she would know what was in them. She kind of acted like that was an inconvenience. I suspect it took away the dramatic license of "packing" her things. Oh well, gotta grow up sometime and leave the high school drama behind. She took everything but the bed, a TV stand that is actually mine and a few wood cubes that make for good storage. It would have been nice of her to take the bed, but then again I can use it. It will take up space I really wanted for myself. (I'm just a whirlwind of contradictions here, I think)

At one point her g/f told me that she was really upset, crying sort of. She said I should go and talk to her. Figuring that her g/f had some insight to Binks brain functions, I attempted to talk to her. It started going downhill immediately. So I stopped. This time the reason for her being so angry with me is that I threw her out, taking her house key from her. Golly gee, it was pretty violent the night we had our blowup. Since, in the past when her sister had fits of stupidity and I would ask her to remove herself, I never took the "key" away and this is what makes her mad. As she sees it, I am always choosing sides. The truth is there was never an opportunity to take the key and Becca never would actually leave. At one point when I told her it was time to go she called the police and they told me I had to go through the courts to evict her. Bottom line here is that no matter what, I will always be the one at fault. She is so much like her dad it is scary. He never accepted responsibility for his actions, and always blamed me (or anyone of his many girlfriends since) for his problems.

I am okay with things this morning. I am not feeling the depression kicking in. Although it is there. From my sleeping patterns this past week, I know it is time to talk to the doctor about it. I know now that she is staying at this friends house. Which is just fine, the friends parents have money, PLENTY of it and I know she is comfortable. And relatively safe. I say relatively, because the other parents can't ever save her from herself. She has two jobs again. A pizza place and at a ranch that runs a therapy horse program. I can now officially get back to my regularly scheduled program.

Since I am off today I have a long list of to dos. We'll see just how far down that list I get. The first is to throw my laundry in and have that working while I am doing other stuff. I believe I will get some boxes and start getting similar things together in my bedroom. What is going to go in the crafty room I will put there in the boxes, so when I start on the room I can just move the boxes around. That way I will be able to move around my bedroom. I think I can actually get the rug up in the crafty room and see what needs to be done to repair the warped flooring.
We had a little change in who was going to take that room. Oldest dtr's boyfriend measured both rooms and decided that they would only gain 4" by taking that back bedroom. No use in moving two bedrooms around at that rate. So the corner room is again mine...all mine! My mind is swirling with what to do first.

Maybe I will book a date on the Jerry Springer show. Sometimes I feel like this house is a candidate for White Trailer Trash Theater!

Sunday, January 13, 2008

The Contest

The poor guys at the Mavericks Contest! Nature seems to have a way to tell us, I am the boss, you will not do as you please. These coordinators of the surf contest, have studied for years about the wave patterns and weather patterns that will best bring in the waves worthy of a contest to call in the best surfers worldwide. These surfers are called only 24 hours in advance and come from Australia, Africa, South America, even Santa Cruz California! They all show up, adrenelin pumping in anticipation of the scariest and most life-threatening ride of their life.
Miss Mother Nature had other plans. The contest went on. Simply because thousands, maybe I should say hundreds of thousands of dollars are spent to set this contest up. The waves were less than spectacular. There was a winner, I think I heard he was from 50 miles down the road in Santa Cruz. I am sure they were all disappointed. There is something about putting your life on the line for a title. There was no one able to put their life on the line yesterday. The waves just weren't having it.
My oldest daughter surfs. I had met a friend who had a son who surfed and my daughter thought he was so cool. So, she decided she wanted to surf too. This is when she was in middle school and a total brat. I made a deal with her. If she would improve her grades, do her chores and quit calling me bad names for three months I would get her the surf board and everything she needed to surf. (Not a cheap venture!) She did it! Grades went from D's and F's to B's and sometimes A's. The chores were done on a daily basis and she tried her darndest not to call me a horrible mother and tell me she hated me.
Too soon came the day that I had to deliver on my side of the promise. I didn't have an awful lot of money back then. So, I scrambled to gather together enough funds to buy the surfboard and a wetsuit. I got to know the guy who now coordinates the Mavericks surf contest. He helped me pull together the necessities to surf, for a very comfortable price. I gave her the stuff for Christmas. She was so happy. (me too, I had a nice young lady for a daughter at the wonderful age of 13!) She couldn't quite get the surfing down, so I asked my new found surf guru what I should do. He offered to meet us at the beach and give her lessons. That catapulted her into this new and exciting world. She told me at one point that she was going to be the first female to surf Mavericks. I told her very sternly...don't tell me before you go, tell me after! I couldn't stand the nervousness of it. She has never done it. Some other girl stoled her thunder. She has surfed for the most part on a regular basis. Her boyfriend surfs too, well, ALL of her friends surf. They are nice people and care for each other in and out of the water.
I won't stand on a board. I need to sit in a kayak, and paddle calm waters...I am chicken.

Friday, January 11, 2008

The thing about blah, blah, blah...

I am so freakin' used to things going wrong here, that I am having a hard time living normally. I find that rather amusing. Nothing has changed here as far as I go. I'm doing the same ol', same ol'. It's just the two girls of mine that give me trouble are either not here, or finally "got" it.
I'm chipping away little by little on the mess I call a bedroom. I have done a few things to the bedroom that was going to be my sewing room, but is now going to be my oldest daughter's room. I will take her "closet" over as a sewing room. It is bright and sunny, not quite as big as the other, but it will be plenty enough. I don't want for much. I have found out about some shelves at work that the GM is closing out, so I think I will just buy all those and put them up in the room, instead of moving the big shelves in from my front room. I won't have to paint them that way either. (I'll still have to paint the others eventually) It's called L-A-Z-Y.
My back yard is still getting cleaned up. Man, this boyfriend of my daughter's rocks. For the first time in years (egads!) I can see the entire back wall of my house. It wasn't covered top to bottom, but it was completely covered side to side. WOW! I forgot all about that wall! It housed the under house entry way. Not that I would ever use that, there's creepy things under the house I am sure. But you know a plumber might need it sometime.
At work, I did all the inventory on one line of pencils today and yesterday. There are only 94 different colors that I carry. It was so messed up. People keep just helping themselves to my stuff. Now, that's not art! I have another line of open stock pencils to do, but that will have to wait til next week. My shipment is due in tomorrow and I have to do price changes on the stuff that is coming in. I have entered them in the computer, just not on the tags by the products. It's a lot of nit-picky work. It's keeps me out of trouble.
Tomorrow is the big Mavericks contest out here. Luckily someone offered an over night stay at their house tonight because the traffic will be hell tomorrow morning. I forgot that thousands of people want to come watch it first hand. That is a futile attempt for them. The actual surfboarding is about a half mile from shore, so you can't see much. They have arranged for nine cameras and are putting the whole thing on the internet for free. I'm sure the news people will be there as well. It really makes a mess of things down there. Everything gets trampled. I am not spending the night at my friends. I can't leave my little dog for that length of time. So I will just leave for work extra early, and if I'm late, I'm late. Cete la vie! (Is that how it's spelled?)

The place where the Mavericks contest takes place is just over that hill. On the other side of that hill is the Pacific Ocean. You should all come out, sometime, it's beautiful. That's the nose of my kayak at the bottom of the picture.

Wednesday, January 09, 2008

Blah blah blah

So, I guess my keyboard had a little drink of iced tea yesterday. There was a confession. It was okay. The keyboard still worked, miraculously. Today though it kind of started sticking when I tapped the keys. instead of one "e", I'd get a dozen. You know, that kind of sticking. So I went out and bought a new one.
I also got a phone call at work from my middle daughter saying that we needed a new shovel. It turns out that the boyfriend kinda like broke the old one. He had left a note asking for one of the girls to call me and ask if I'd bring one home or if they didn't want to do that, a note to me saying "I'm sorry, I broke the shovel, would you please buy a new one and I'll reimburse you." Well, I think it's not necessary to make him pay for a shovel that broke, because it's old, while he's doing work in my back yard, because he is grateful that I let him stay here. I bought two shovels. One has a flat tip the other has a more pointy tip. This way we will have a shovel for all occasions. Besides, they were cheap and I get a discount. Or...he could do twice as much! HAHAHA.
Weather was nice today. On again off again clouds. No warmth though, it stayed around the low fifties all day, now it is even cooler.
I went to bed to read at around 8PM last night. I fell asleep with the book in my hand. When I woke up I tried to read some more, but it was of no use, the sandman had me in his sights. I woke up before my alarm this morning at 4:15! I tried really hard to go back to sleep, but the sandman had had his way with me and he was done! Men!
Well, I hope you are all well. Have a great day tomorrow, or today...when ever you are reading this...may it be great!

Tuesday, January 08, 2008

Stormin' again.

I'm glad I don't have to be out on the roads today. It's been windy (15 - 25MPH winds) all day and raining on and off. I have taken the opportunity to catch up on laundry. Keeping in mind that I could lose power. It's stuff I need washed and dried, so I am praying that we won't have a go at the olden days. I can deal with no power, I'll just read. And wrap up in blankets, because it is so windy I can't have a fire. There's nothing to keep the wind from blowing the smoke back down my chimney. That's counter productive. If I have a fire I will also have to have the doors open to let the smoke out.
I have also started picking up my room. It just never sunk in while I was growing up that I needed to keep it clean. I don't. I can be a pure slob at times. That's one of the benefits (?) of not having a guy around, I can be lazy. Although, now my oldest dtr's boyfriend is staying here and he is an organizer. YAY for me! He has cleaned the backyard up, my shelves in the front room, and has started on the garage. He says he is just trying to show me how much he appreciates me letting him stay here. Well, that is fine with me.
I also took a couple of stitches in a gift I am making. It's a secret though, so I can't say anymore than that.
Oops! Gotta go, the dryer is calling me! Hope you are tucked in cozy where ever you are!

Monday, January 07, 2008

A different sort of day.

I woke up at 5 AM today. I was having a coughing fit. I think it was too warm and dry in my room. I was going to turn over and go back to sleep, but somehow when I do that I end up being upset with myself because I have wasted part of the day. (Leftovers from my upbringing) It's all good.
I sat at the computer for hours drinking my coffee. (What is the difference wasting the day this way and wasting it sleeping? Really, is there a difference?) Made myself some bacon, biscuits and gravy for breakfast, and then decided to get dressed. I literally walked in circles for a while, cause I wanted to get something done, but I wasn't quite sure of what it was that I wanted to do first. I finally just grabbed up some tools and went out to clean up that window that was broken by my dtr last month. Got that done and my oldest dtr and I went to pick up another tool I needed to put the new glass in the window. We stopped at the grocery store and picked up some stuff for dinner. One of my coworkers, her partner and her partner's sister were coming over to do some crafting and have dinner. They were going to bring tri-tips that she cut in half and marinated in two different flavors. (Jamaican jerk and teriyaki)
While we were out my friend texted me and told me to go through my pictures and pick out some that meant something to me, because they were bringing material over to do a collage. When we got home my dtr got ready for work and I set up all the food things I needed to for dinner and then set out to figure out what pics I wanted to use. I basically went with a family theme.
When the girls all got here, we picked out background paper and stickers and then I cut my pictures to make them prettier to look at. When my oldest got home I had her and her sister help with the collage. Then my friends framed it for me and we hung it up.
We cleared the table of crafty things and put out the food, and feasted. I laughed and joked and had such a good time. You know, I just love having friends around.
This is a big first for me. We usually don't have much company. When we do it's family from out of town and we sit and catch up on the rest of the family who aren't here. (I would have said gossip, but ya know...)
My daughters really enjoyed having my friends here. Of course the friends are closer in age to my kids than they are to me. Now, it's 11PM and I am finally tired. I get reved up when I do something different, like I don't want to let go of the feeling, and if I go to sleep it will go away. I am going to bed and will probably be up at 5AM again tomorrow. Oh well, it's all good.

Sunday, January 06, 2008

I am May

tagged me, saying if I wanted to do this I could:

1. Mention the person who tagged you and create a link back to them
2. Copy-paste the traits for all the twelve months.
3. Pick your month of birth.
4. Highlight the traits that apply to you.
5. Tag 12 people and let them know by visiting their blogs and leaving a comment for them.
6. Let the person who tagged you know when you’ve done it! was a good lesson in computer literacy! I learned some stuff too Kim!

JANUARY: Stubborn and hard-hearted. Ambitious and serious. Loves to teach and be taught. Always looking at people’s flaws and weaknesses. Likes to criticize. Hardworking and productive. Smart, neat and organized. Sensitive and has deep thoughts. Knows how to make others happy. Quiet unless excited or tensed. Rather reserved. Highly attentive. Resistant to illnesses but prone to colds. Romantic but has difficulties expressing love. Loves children. Loyal. Has great social abilities yet easily jealous. Very stubborn and money cautious.

FEBRUARY: Abstract thoughts. Loves reality and abstract. Intelligent and clever. Changing personality. Attractive. Sexy. Temperamental. Quiet, shy and humble. Honest and loyal. Determined to reach goals. Loves freedom. Rebellious when restricted. Loves aggressiveness. Too sensitive and easily hurt. Gets angry really easily but does not show it. Dislikes unnecessary things. Loves making friends but rarely shows it. Daring and stubborn. Ambitious. Realizes dreams and hopes. Sharp. Loves entertainment and leisure. Romantic on the inside not outside. Superstitious and ludicrous. Spendthrift. Tries to learn to show emotions.MARCH: Attractive personality. Sexy. Affectionate. Shy and reserved. Secretive. Naturally honest, generous and sympathetic. Loves peace and serenity. Sensitive to others. Loves to serve others. Easily angered. Trustworthy. Appreciative and returns kindness. Observant and assesses others. Revengeful. Loves to dream and fantasize. Loves traveling. Loves attention. Hasty decisions in choosing partners. Loves home decors. Musically talented. Loves special things. Moody.

FEBRUARY: Abstract thoughts. Loves reality and abstract. Intelligent and clever. Changing personality. Attractive. Sexy. Temperamental. Quiet, shy and humble. Honest and loyal. Determined to reach goals. Loves freedom. Rebellious when restricted. Loves aggressiveness. Too sensitive and easily hurt. Gets angry really easily but does not show it. Dislikes unnecessary things. Loves making friends but rarely shows it. Daring and stubborn. Ambitious. Realizes dreams and hopes. Sharp. Loves entertainment and leisure. Romantic on the inside not outside. Superstitious and ludicrous. Spendthrift. Tries to learn to show emotions.MARCH: Attractive personality. Sexy. Affectionate. Shy and reserved. Secretive. Naturally honest, generous and sympathetic. Loves peace and serenity. Sensitive to others. Loves to serve others. Easily angered. Trustworthy. Appreciative and returns kindness. Observant and assesses others. Revengeful. Loves to dream and fantasize. Loves traveling. Loves attention. Hasty decisions in choosing partners. Loves home decors. Musically talented. Loves special things. Moody.

MARCH: Attractive personality. Sexy. Affectionate. Shy and reserved. Secretive. Naturally honest, generous and sympathetic. Loves peace and serenity. Sensitive to others. Loves to serve others. Easily angered. Trustworthy. Appreciative and returns kindness. Observant and assesses others. Revengeful. Loves to dream and fantasize. Loves traveling. Loves attention. Hasty decisions in choosing partners. Loves home decors. Musically talented. Loves special things. Moody.APRIL: Active and dynamic. Decisive and hasty but tends to regret. Attractive and affectionate to oneself. Strong mentality. Loves attention. Diplomatic. Consoling, friendly and solves people’s problems. Brave and fearless. Adventurous. Loving and caring. Suave and generous. Emotional. Aggressive. Hasty. Good memory. Moving. Motivates oneself and others. Sickness usually of the head and chest. Sexy in a way that only their lover can see.

APRIL: Active and dynamic. Decisive and hasty but tends to regret. Attractive and affectionate to oneself. Strong mentality. Loves attention. Diplomatic. Consoling, friendly and solves people’s problems. Brave and fearless. Adventurous. Loving and caring. Suave and generous. Emotional. Aggressive. Hasty. Good memory. Moving. Motivates oneself and others. Sickness usually of the head and chest. Sexy in a way that only their lover can see.

MAY: Stubborn and hard-hearted. Strong-willed and highly motivated. Sharp thoughts. Easily angered. Attracts others and loves attention. Deep feelings. Beautiful physically and mentally. Firm Standpoint. Needs no motivation. Easily consoled. Systematic (left brain). Loves to dream. Strong clairvoyance. Understanding. Sickness usually in the ear and neck. Good imagination. Good physical. Weak breathing. Loves literature and the arts. Loves traveling. Dislike being at home. Restless. Not having many children. (Well, four of them) Hardworking. High spirited. Spendthrift.

JUNE: Thinks far with vision. Easily influenced by kindness. Polite and soft-spoken. Having ideas. Sensitive. Active mind. Hesitating, tends to delay. Choosy and always wants the best. Temperamental. Funny and humorous. Loves to joke. Good debating skills. Talkative. Daydreamer. Friendly. Knows how to make friends. Able to show character. Easily hurt. Prone to getting colds. Loves to dress up. Easily bored. Fussy. Seldom shows emotions. Takes time to recover when hurt. Brand conscious. Executive. Stubborn.

JULY: Fun to be with. Secretive. Difficult to fathom and to be understood. Quiet unless excited or tensed. Takes pride in oneself. Has reputation. Easily consoled. Honest. Concerned about people’s feelings. Tactful. Friendly. Approachable. Emotional temperamental and unpredictable. Moody and easily hurt. Witty and sparkly. Not revengeful. Forgiving but never forgets. Dislikes nonsensical and unnecessary things. Guides others physically and mentally. Sensitive and forms impressions carefully. Caring and loving. Treats others equally. Strong sense of sympathy. Wary and sharp. Judges people through observations. Hardworking. No difficulties in studying. Loves to be alone. Always broods about the past and the old friends. Likes to be quiet. Homely person. Waits for friends. Never looks for friends. Not aggressive unless provoked. Prone to having stomach and dieting problems. Loves to be loved. Easily hurt but takes long to recover.

AUGUST: Loves to joke. Attractive. Suave and caring. Brave and fearless. Firm and has leadership qualities. Knows how to console others. Too generous and egoistic. Takes high pride in oneself. Thirsty for praises. Extraordinary spirit. Easily angered. Angry when provoked. Easily jealous. Observant. Careful and cautious. Thinks quickly. Independent thoughts. Loves to lead and to be led. Loves to dream. Talented in the arts, music and defense. Sensitive but not petty. Poor resistance against illnesses. Learns to relax. Hasty and trusty. Romantic. Loving and caring. Loves to make friends.

SEPTEMBER: Suave and compromising. Careful, cautious and organized. Likes to point out people’s mistakes. Likes to criticize. Stubborn. Quiet but able to talk well. Calm and cool. Kind and sympathetic. Concerned and detailed. Loyal but not always honest. Does work well. Very confident. Sensitive. Good memory. Clever and knowledgeable. Loves to look for information. Must control oneself when criticizing. Able to motivate oneself. Understanding. Fun to be around. Secretive. Loves leisure and traveling. Hardly shows emotions. Tends to bottle up feelings. Very choosy, especially in relationships. Systematic.

OCTOBER: Loves to chat. Loves those who loves them. Loves to take things at the center. Inner and physical beauty. Lies but doesn’t pretend. Gets angry often. Treats friends importantly. Always making friends. Easily hurt but recovers easily. Daydreamer. Opinionated. Does not care of what others think. Emotional. Decisive. Strong clairvoyance. Loves to travel, the arts and literature. Touchy and easily jealous. Concerned. Loves outdoors. Just and fair. Spendthrift. Easily influenced. Easily loses confidence. Loves children.

NOVEMBER: Has a lot of ideas. Difficult to fathom. Thinks forward. Unique and brilliant. Extraordinary ideas. Sharp thinking. Fine and strong clairvoyance. Can become good doctors. Dynamic in personality. Secretive. Inquisitive. Knows how to dig secrets. Always thinking. Less talkative but amiable. Brave and generous. Patient. Stubborn and hard-hearted. If there is a will, there is a way. Determined. Never give up. Hardly becomes angry unless provoked. Loves to be alone. Thinks differently from others. Sharp-minded. Motivates oneself. Does not appreciate praises. High-spirited. Well-built and tough. Deep love and emotions. Romantic. Uncertain in relationships. Homely. Hardworking. High abilities. Trustworthy. Honest and keeps secrets. Not able to control emotions. Unpredictable.

DECEMBER: Loyal and generous. Sexy. Patriotic. Active in games and interactions. Impatient and hasty. Ambitious. Influential in organizations. Fun to be with. Loves to socialize. Loves praises. Loves attention. Loves to be loved. Honest and trustworthy. Not pretending. Short tempered. Changing personality. Not egotistic. Take high pride in oneself. Hates restrictions. Loves to joke. Good sense of humor. Logical.

Okay, now, I bolded and italicized "easily angered", because just this morning, before I had even had a full cup of coffee, I was easily angered. My middle dtr had a little party in her room. It's a separate building in my backyard. No problem. They were being as responsible as 21 y/o's can be I guess. This morning, when she figured she had been sober long enough to drive, she took her friends home. Well, two of the three that were there. The third one (a guy) came in the house after she had gotten back from her little trip. I made some comment to my other dtr's boyfriend about how Bec's needs to learn whose house this is. And then shut my mouth. Well, the guy was sitting in my german shepherd's fav chair, so the dogs were kind of dancing around the chair and the shepherd was trying to rub the guy off the chair ( my shepherd is passive aggressive, but mostly passive) and the idiot starting HITTING my dog!!!!! Then he KICKED him!!!! So, I said to the guy (Oh fairly loudly) Hey, hey, hey! Don't you hit my dog! And I went out to my dtr's room and told her to get her (bleep) in the house and tell the guy to get out. She wouldn't, that made me more mad, so I came back in and yelled at him something about being an idiot and getting out of my house now. And Mr. DUH, says to me, I'm not an idiot. Well, that just unleashed another several swear words from my mouth and explaining just exactly what an idiot is..."If you go into someone else's house, and hit and/or kick their dog(s)...that makes you an idiot. GET OUT!" So he did, but he slammed my door really, really hard.
I know I have never been an angel. And in the past, I have helped fools like him, but why in God's name am I being inundated with people like this now? Geez! I need to buy an island and go move on it, so I can be...alone...naw, not really.

Friday, January 04, 2008


Work was so much fun today! NOT!!! I went in at 7am. Which means I really left my house at 6am. Stopped at Starbucks to load up on the good stuff for my fun drive. It was blowing up to 70 MPH and the rain was coming down in buckets. The first part of my trip was on the highway that goes through a eucalyptis grove and it's hillside on one side cliff on the other. The " eucys" had shed leaves, bark and their seeds all over the road. It is a treacherous place to drive and a tree can come down at any time. But what do I think??? I think, WOW, it really smells good here!

The power was on when I left home, but as I was driving into the city where I work I can see flashes of light in the sky and then the lights around me blinked out. YAY! I still have to work, we are the only hardware gig in town. Lights came right back on, then I see flashes two more times, the lights went on and off two more times. (in about a five minute period) What I was witnessing was the transformers blowing up all over town. We eventually had permanent lights out around 10am at work. That just means lots of work. Cause every one in town needs batteries, tarps boots, kerosene, etc. Cause you know we were told about this storm for the last three days and we have a tendency not to believe our weather people here. They lie a lot. So, they are telling us that there will be no lights at least the rest of today and all of tomorrow. Some even said Sunday.
My boss let me go home early, cause the road I drive is really, really scary in the best of weather. (A 400 foot drop into the Pacific Ocean in some places.) I came home and luckily the local gas station was open for business "if" you wanted premium gas. They ran out of everything else cause they were the only gas gig in town here. I want any gas, this is not a time to be out of it. I have batteries for my little punk TV just in case, and I got garbage bags. Well, ya never know, I just want to be prepared. They could be my new fashion statement.
The power was on at my house, although it was out for a good part of the day. My daughter tried to learn how to make coffee the hobo way, but said it was disgusting. I will have to teach her that someday. I hope you are all well. I am feeling a little better now that I have made a decision to not let someone else be my priority while I am just their...oh gosh what is that Kim-D????? Option? And thank you for that somehow fits right now.

Wednesday, January 02, 2008

No silver linings today.

Just the dark clouds.

I'm done. I am not talking about it anymore. I can't even think about her anymore. She has decided to rake me over the coals. She doesn't even realize what went on and what I was thinking. I apparently have been using her since she was thirteen. She is out there with all her little gangster want to be friends, complaining about me and telling her side of the story and they are only going to agree with her.

I am putting her stuff in the garage and when she comes to get it, she can only go that far. I am not going to put my heart out there for her to trample on any more. She's already broken it. I know, I know, you are all saying she will come around someday. I won't wait. I'm not going to hope. That's it.

Tuesday, January 01, 2008


I got a call today from a friend of Binks that is helping her place her beloved dog Dozer with a new family. I can't imagine her giving up that dog, but this is what her friend tells me. She can't have the dog in the place where she will be staying. The friend is a rescue person, who places animals out of the kindness of her heart. She (the friend) called me today during a New Year's brunch that my other two girls and I fixed. Of course, that upset my applecart! She wanted to see if I knew of anyone who could keep the dog until Friday. She can't take the dog to his new home until then. I told her I knew of no one. Since I really think she wanted me to say that I would take him, I told her that under the circumstances, I would not be getting in the middle of anything that she was doing for Binks, since Binks did not seem to like me much right now. She thanked me anyway and that was the end of the conversation.
It welled up feelings in me. One was relief, that Binks won't be sleeping in her truck on the streets anymore and another was anger that she once again is giving up something she dearly loves because she is so flippin' stubborn. Well, it's another shovel full towards digging that hole she is going to find herself at the bottom of.